Off The Virg

Spent the weekend fishing with Dad.  We met at West Whitlocks friday night, but Dad didn't get there until late.  Saturday was beautiful, calm and sunny which almost NEVER happens on the Missourri river.  Other than problems with the borrowed boat that I won't go into now.  We finally got to fishing in the early afternoon but only caught one mediocre smallmouth (dad got it).  Had another issue with the borrowed boat (grumble) so we went back to shore, fixed the problem took a little nap/reading break.  Went back out in the early evening, again, beautiful out there, and fished.  As the evening fell we watched a couple of rainclouds blow up into squalls, which was when I caught my two walleyes.  A 16" and a 5lb 24"!  Wooo!  Then the storms blew up and we had to go in.  We went back out again this morning but it was nice again and the walleyes just weren't hitting.    All in all, good time, nice weekend, tired and sun burnt some, glad I went.  Did you miss me?   Didn't think so.

Walleyes

Way too cool.

Although I am not as excited about it as good old Vincent* was, it is nice to have a little time.  Of course, there isn't any rest for the wicked, now I'm hanging out with the boys and trying to find things to do with them.  Today was the first day for all of us but we kept it on the down low since all of us are suffering various levels of cold we caught from my Dad while working on the cabin over Memorial Day weekend.  It's really nice to watch things come together on that project.  Within a year or so I hope those of you who would like to visit will be able to, it's going to be a nice comfortable place to go.

One of the fun things about internet is that I can have my kids do little research projects.  I know that sounds sort of sick but it's fun.  Eldest didn't get the joke when the camel on the Muppet show was named Sopwith.  I had him look up Sopwith Camel.  Learned something.  Secondus really liked the African drumming from "Turn the World Around" with Harry Belafonte.  Yup, research time!  And yes, we have been enjoying our Muppets Season 3.  Guess which guest was the boys favorite?

Don't think that I will be spending my summer eating bon-bons and lazing around the casa though.  I do have a summer class every Tues and my mission trip to Mexico is coming up soon.  And there's regularly scheduled trips to the cabin for work and play and this weekend I'm going to the Missouri river fishing with Dad.

In other news I have received two letters from college, the first admitting me officially to the school of Ed, which is nice since I can only take one of my fall classes without that, and the second advising me that I made the Dean's List again this semester.  Gotta admit, I'm pretty proud of that.  Funny how much more I enjoy learning now that I'm old.  So I won't be substitute teaching this summer, but I will be pretty busy.

*Vincent Furnier of Detroit

In cleaning out the inbox of my ancient Yahoo mail account, I found this gem.  I think Capn Rooba sent it to me (who I REALLY need to call one of these days)  but it still cracks me up so I thought I would share it with you all...

Paleoanthropology Division
Smithsonian Institute
207 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington DC 20078

Dear Sir:

Thank you for your latest submission to the Institute, labeled "211-D, 
layer seven, next to the clothesline post. Hominid skull." We have
given this specimen a careful and detailed examination, and regret to inform 
you that we disagree with your theory that it represents "conclusive 
proof of the presence of Early Man in Charleston County two million 
years ago." Rather, it appears that what you have found is the head of
a Barbie doll, of the variety one of out staff, who has small children, 
believes to be the "Malibu Barbie." It is evident that you have given a
great deal of thought to the analysis of this specimen, and you may be 
quite certain that those of us who are familiar with your prior work in
the field were loathe to come to contradiction with your findings. 
However, we do feel that there are a number of physical attributes of 
the specimen which might have tipped you off to its modern origin:
1. The material is molded plastic. Ancient hominid remains are
 typically fossilized bone.
2. The cranial capacity of the specimen is approximately 9 cubic 
centimeters, well below the threshold of even the earliest identified 
proto-hominids.
3. The dentition pattern evident on the "skull" is more consistent with
the common domesticated dog than it is with the "ravenous man-eating 
Pliocene clams" you speculate roamed the wetlands during that time.
 
This latter finding is certainly one of the most intriguing hypotheses you 
have submitted in your history with this institution, but the evidence 
seems to weigh rather heavily against it. Without going into too much 
detail, let us say that:
A. The specimen looks like the head of a Barbie doll that a dog has 
chewed on.
B. Clams don't have teeth.

It is with feelings tinged with melancholy that we must deny your 
request to have the specimen carbon dated. This is partially due to the
heavy load out lab must bear in its normal operation, and partly due to
carbon dating's notorious inaccuracy in fossils of recent geologic 
record. To the best of our knowledge, no Barbie dolls were produced 
prior to 1956 AD, and carbon dating is likely to produce wildly 
inaccurate results. Sadly, we must also deny your request that we 
approach the National Science Foundation's Phylogeny Department with
the concept of assigning your specimen the scientific name 
"Australopithecus spiff-arino."
Speaking personally, I, for one, fought tenaciously for 
the acceptance of your proposed taxonomy, but was ultimately voted down
because the species name you selected was hyphenated, and didn't really
sound like it might be Latin.

However, we gladly accept your generous donation of this fascinating 
specimen to the museum. While it is undoubtedly not a hominid fossil,
it is, nonetheless, yet another riveting example of the great body of work
you seem to accumulate here so effortlessly. You should know that our 
Director has reserved a special shelf in his own office for the display
of the specimen you have previously submitted to the Institution, and 
the entire staff speculates daily on what you will happen upon next in 
your digs at the site you have discovered in your back yard. We eagerly
anticipate your trip to our nation's capital that you proposed in your 
last letter, and several of us are pressing the Director to pay for it.
 
We are particularly interested in hearing you expand on your theories 
surrounding the "trans-positating fillifitation of ferrous ions in a 
structural matrix" that makes the excellent juvenile Tyrannosaurus rex 
femur you recently discovered take on the deceptive appearance of the 
rusty 9-mm Sears Craftsman automotive crescent wrench.

Yours In Science,
Harvey Rowe
Curator, Antiquities

1976II

It didn't look like this, but I always wished it could have.  My first real car was a 1976 Ford Mustang II.  I think my Dad got it in trade for an air conditioner.  It was the color they called "Ford Dove Gray"  which, unless washed waxed and shined, looked suspiciously like primer.  It had a 4 cylinder 2.3L motor and a little "MPG" sticker beside the front wheel.  It was the economy model.  It didn't stay that way.  It was farting around working on that car that I first began to get along with my Dad.  We wound up with a frankenstien-ed V8 road bullet.  I still have a soft spot for that car, and someday, if I have the garage space, I'm going to get another one and do it up right.  I would like to note that I think the new Mustangs look more like the Mustang II's than the full size Steve McQueen fastback that people claim.

Show us the contents of your bag or pockets.

I don't have time or space for all the crap in my school bag so...

Pocketses

no real surprises.  Keys, wallet, change, Menards receipt, pen (note it's from the Tulare locker where we get our deer processed.  Old school represent!)  my pocket knife which I have to be careful not to put in my pocket when I'm subbing.

As an aside, if anyone out there is seeking an excellent pocket knife, the Kershaw Leek, designed by Ken Onion.  Outstanding!  'bout 40 bucks, you can even get it in the sporting goods dept at Wal-Marx.  I'd go to Smoky Mountain Knife works if you don't want to support the "evil empire".

Which reminds me.  I know that it isn't in the media much anymore, but since the Shaft case (former wal-mart employee, hit by truck, sued after she got settlement from trucking company, going to be left penniless and brain damaged) I quit shopping Wal-mart.  I think I heard that they did drop the suit but to little to late.  I had some objections before but this whole thing put them over the top. 

Show us your favorite tool.
Submitted by Maraschino.

Tool is pretty vague so you get two.

A.  Old hand tool.  My Estwing hammer.  I've had it for at least 10 years now, good hammer.  My dad whines about it being too heavy, that I'm using a post-maul for driving shingle nails (I think it's a 22oz).  Maybe that's why I like it, just to get a rise out of Dad.

B. New power tool.  Just bought my circular saw this fall.  It was my anniversary present (15 years IS powertools isn't it?)   Love this thing, powerful, lightweight and fast.  I think it's going to last a long long time. 

What fictional character do you relate to most and why?

I personally relate well to Quoyle from The Shipping News not only in terms of being a big feller, but literate, who has had two meaningful relationshis, one stormy sexual and one-sided (also short lived) and one steady, accepting and loving.

The Shipping News

E. Annie Proulx